While we aren’t all that clever, the lesson to be learned here is the engaging and fun parts. I also follow a food blog called cookingwithamy.blogspot.com. She shares her experiences in and around the food world (like going to the Pillsbury Bake-Off and reporting on it), recipes, book reviews, you name it. You never know what she is going to be covering, so it is interesting to sign up for notices of her new blog entries.

Neil’s party approach is so good. Most of us work so hard at our various projects and jobs, that I do think this “networking” thing has to remain fun or have amazing instructional value (like Kris and Dean’s posts), or people just drift away.

My concern with on line networking is the ease with which such communication can be misunderstood. Because I’m as old as dirt I was in the workplace when e-mail was the new thing and have seen ugly (and I mean UGLY) incidents occur over e-mail. Not to me, because I’m careful (Canadian, eh? ), but certainly to others, that damaged relationships.

I find in e-mail sometimes, because people are at a keyboard rather than face to face, they say things they may not say in person. I can’t imagine what people say when they can hide behind a user name.

The other thing I’ve seen is people on their “crackberry”, or other communication device, like a drug addict. Very scary.

I know myself fairly well and if I really had fun on twitter etc then I could easily see me dropping into the sink hole.

My response to the need to be social is to go to the local coffee shop with freinds and actually talk in person. I may be a little old fashioned but good conversation and a nice cup of coffee in the real, rather than the virtual, world works, at least for me.

My 2 cents.

I have an idea that might address two ideas brought up —

1. Networking as online party.
Great comparison. For this I’m going to use a convention as an example, because it’s a party with a lot of little parties going on — panels, demonstrations, conversations in the hall.

2. Balancing/organizing visits.

You want to plan your experience so you make sure you don’t miss the panels and parties you discussed with your friends during the car ride to the convention.

Currently I plan out which sites to visit every day, and which to visit every week.

I could put them in a list of bookmarks or online on del.icio.us, or even copy and paste from a text file. But I list them in a free password program called KeePass, just ’cause I’m a geek. People usually use this for keeping passwords, but with it I can quickly right-click through a pre-strategized list of URLs.

Using my URL listkeeper of choice, I right-click, the browser opens, and there’s the next site. I read the content, congratulate someone on a success, and before I get too involved, there’s KeePass staring at me from the screen with the other sites I’d planned to visit. I’ve included my email addresses and the social sites in the list.

With this method I find more of the good convention events in less time. Hopefully it evens out my attendance in various social rooms, too, so I visit friends who might otherwise feel shunned and don’t stay long enough in any one room to start being boorish.

I hope that idea helps anyone struggling with the oft-bemoaned Internet Time Sink.

Carolyn

P. S. I should set an alarm so I have a predetermined time limit to get through the list, shouldn’t I? There’s an idea.

And I still get new followers from those from time to time. I’d like to think I’ve made connections because I’m genuine. When I read something I enjoy, I make sure to tell the person, and they enjoy that, of course. And I like telling people I enjoy their work.

I’ve developed a camaraderie with some people without having ever met them. Fascinating.

I really like Neil’s quote. “I’m not sure if any [of what I do online] is networking.”

That’s really how I think of it, too. I’m making friends and meeting new people. I follow a couple hundred people and about the same number follow me on twitter. Of those, there’s probably 15-20 that I regularly converse with. I do it for fun. It’s not for networking. It’s being social. But at the same time, I follow people I am interested in. I am not trying to Network with Nathan Fillion. Caesar Milan follows back. I don’t think I am social or networked with Caesar Milan just because he follows me.

There are certainly strategies that people market with the same social tools, but most of us ignore it. Some unfollow. I don’t bother.

If you’re thinking about it as work –I need to tweet to get followers, it’s probably not worth it. But then again, there are some self-published authors with 10,000+ followers and I see a lot of links to their books in their tweets. Maybe it is working for them. I don’t know.

My thought is if you are doing it for fun, it’s not a time sink.

The other important point in the article, from my perspective, is to treat this as an online party, or social gathering, and a chance to have conversations about a wide range of topics. I personally love to do this so this appeals to me, but also worries me a little.

Also, my perception is (and I’d love comments on this) once you have a “following” you have to keep up with tweeting etc on a regular basis or your “following” is going to be annoyed with you. To me this means I’m not in control as I am with my own blog.

Very worth while topic, Kris. Social networking on the web has been on my radar for some time.

Though now that I’ve listed my readership, I would also say its not about stats. It’s about meeting interesting people and having great conversations. I’ve been invited to speak at conferances and sat on panels because of my blog. I had never in a million years have thought that would happen, and I’m not even sure sometimes why I’m there, but its fun.

Even this morning I had a nice thrill. The Eyeborg guy (has a camera in his missing eye) started following me on twitter and tweeted that I have the best augmented reality blog out there. I’m mean, how cool is that? I have a cyborg following me on twitter! ;p

Btw, I’d also suggest Seth Godin or Tim Ferriss blogs (both non-fiction writers). I’ve learned a lot about social networking from reading their sites.

Tom